


Final Fancy Sailor

by NanakiBH



Series: HeroTV Forums [3]
Category: Tiger & Bunny
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Comedy, Cosplay, Crossdressing Kink, M/M, MMORPGs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-02-23 06:46:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2538149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NanakiBH/pseuds/NanakiBH
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The other heroes decide to try their hand at Ivan's favorite online roleplaying game. No game is meant to be taken this seriously.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Nice Guys Finish Last

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place somewhere within the Forumverse universe. I'm pretty sure you can enjoy it even if you've never read anything else from that series, though.

All of his favorite things had been getting ruined lately.

Why.

Who was doing this to him? Did God find it funny to make all of his friends so embarrassing? There were only a few things that Ivan loved and at the very top were anime and games. Specifically, this one.

_Final Fancy Sailor 3: Arc of Time and Love._

It was the latest update to the Final Fancy Sailor MMO series, which he had been a member of for years. When the new one was announced, he ran out and put a pre-order on it and waited anxiously for months until he was able to buy it with his hard-earned money and hold it in his hands.

The day it came out was a momentous occasion. He made sure to wear his favorite Fancy Sailor shirt and got up extra early so that he could be sure to receive the pre-order item. When he got home that day, he gazed lovingly upon its case; his two favorite mascots of the series dressed in their warrior attire in the boxart, holding up their Magi Magi Power Wandswords. (Those were, like, wands and swords together. It meant they were able to control both magic and attack like magicians and swordsmen. They were a lot cooler than gunblades.)

He spent his day happily installing and updating and introducing his character to the new home world. He just wished that he had a little more free time to spend playing the game - not that he didn’t already have enough gold (he was like a millionaire in Fancy Sailor terms) but he wanted to level up a little more to get some of the new items.

A few days later, while at the training center, Kotetsu approached him and held up something that suddenly made Ivan grow cold with horror.

In his hands was a copy of Final Fancy Sailor 3.

_“Why do you have that?”_ he asked, the only thing he could say instead of _No, you are not allowed to play this with me. I know what you’re thinking._

He was so right. Kotetsu grinned in that way of his and waved the box around, seeming happy that Ivan recognized what it was. Apparently, his daughter wanted to get into the game because some of her friends at school were really into it. The problem was, she was horribly new and under-leveled and her friends didn’t want someone like that in their party, so she needed help. At least, that was what Ivan assumed Kotetsu was saying because it sounded like he had no idea what he was talking about. He kept using all the wrong terminology.

Typically, Ivan wouldn’t agree to something like this for anyone. It was hard enough for him to level up to the point he had reached and gold was a precious commodity. He was slightly considering agreeing just because it was Kotetsu, but then he gave his grand idea that made Ivan realize that there was no way he was getting out of it.

_”I want all of us to play it together!”_

That was the moment where Ivan shed a tear inside. Much like his forums, his favorite game was going to get completely ruined by his friends. They were all great people, but... Ivan really doubted that they would know what to do with a massively multiplayer online game. Just thinking about his friends and the word ‘online’ together in one thought made him break out in a cold sweat now.

Ivan thought it was smart that he had a different username for the game. However, he never realized how much he would be regretting his name choice. In fact, when he viewed his whole player character from the perspective of what the others might think, he realized that it was all a bit embarrassing.

Her name was nATALIE and she was a level forty-eight wandsword-wielding catgirl. Okay, so it was a little on the furry side. Her features were more cat than human, but he thought she was absolutely adorable. Fighting with her at first had been tough because he hated seeing her get hurt, but now he had managed to take one of the game’s normally weakest characters and turn her into an overpowered beast who could take on any opponent. Except for maybe the legendary dragon at the end of the Cave of Eternal Sorrows. He needed a party if he ever wanted to defeat that thing.

And thus, Ivan discovered a reason why having the others around might not be so bad.

Apparently, at Kotetsu’s prompting, the other heroes had gone out and bought their own copies of the game. They all decided on a time when they would be available to play it and agreed to meet up in the game. Before that time, Ivan made sure to give each of them the rundown on what the game was about and how they were supposed to set up their characters. That way, he wouldn’t have to spend forty minutes on the phone with any of them, giving them the walkthrough on how to do it.

On the night when they were to play the game, Ivan made himself some popcorn and put on his sleeping clothes and made himself comfortable in his computer chair.

No matter what was going to happen, popcorn was necessary because it was bound to be entertaining if nothing else.

He ran nATALIE over to the designated area and waited for the others to show up. The place where they were meeting was one of the most commonly visited hubs in the game for new players. It was like a forest with tall trees and lush vegetation, some small wooden buildings for buying and trading, and a central area for such meet-ups as theirs. As he waited, sitting idly, his character swung her arms at her sides and looked as bored as could be. He ran off to buy some items for a minute and there was still no one there by the time he made it back.

After another ten minutes of waiting, his character sat down on the ground and started playing with the edges of her cape. (He bought that cape just to watch her do that. So cute.) Ivan himself was no better, munching slowly on his popcorn, trying to make it last. If he ate it all before they even got there, he was going to be disappointed.

Then from between some trees came running a new female character. Behind her, her blue ponytail bounced with every step. She stopped in front of him and the chatbox displayed a message from Shiva18.

 **Shiva18:** [We need help! Do you know Ivan?]

nATALIE stood, brandishing her wandsword in one hand.

 **nATALIE:** [That would be me.]

 **Shiva18:** [There’s a monster that started attacking us all and we aren’t doing too good. Come help us!]

Ivan assumed that this was the Fancy Sailor version of Karina - or was she trying to make her character look like Blue Rose? Whatever she had done, despite the limitations she had as a new player, she had managed to make her character look pretty cute. He followed Shiva18 back to wherever she had come from and discovered a mess of other noobs tripping over their own feet as they attempted to do battle with a dragon that was probably twice their levels combined.

 **nATALIE:** [Stand back, I got this.]

Finally, some action. Summoning flames to the tip of her wand, nATALIE let loose with a powerful fire magic spell at the green forest dragon. That was all it took to kill the beast. Its writhing carcass disappeared and each person in the group who had fought with it received the appropriate amount of experience points and they all leveled up by one.

[Thank you!] came a message from the user Tora.

The one voicing their gratitude was another human character who very much resembled Kotetsu. In fact, now that Ivan was looking around at the group of them, they all looked a little like their real life counterparts... As closely as they could come when they had only so many facial feature presets to choose from, at least.

[Is this... Ivan?] asked the Pao-lin-ish one. This one, though in the image of Pao-lin, also included a long cat tail. It also helped that he recognized the username.

 **Shiva18:** [That’s what he said.]

 **pikapika:** [Oh. hay Ivan!]

 **Tora:** [why’s he a girl??]

 **nATALIE:** [Because I just liked this character. Don’t think too hard about it.]

A smiley face and a heart appeared over the head of the one that most resembled Nathan.

 **BlazeRunner:** [Don’t worry, honey. I would love you no matter what you chose for your character to look like.]

Ivan was pretty sure that he was trying to tell him that he would accept him no matter what lifestyle he chose for some reason... He still thanked him anyway and he complimented them all on their avatars, which they really had done a spectacular job on, considering. They were going to look a lot different once they started getting some armor on themselves, though.

[I think there’s still one us missing,] said Coronado, the only person in the group who used the avatar type that resembled a bull. “Is Barnaby not here?”

Of course he wouldn’t be there. If he didn’t even enjoy visiting the forum, then why would someone like him waste his time playing a game?

 **Tora:** [I’ll give him a call!]

 **nATALIE:** [Don’t bother. He probably doesn’t even want to play. Let’s just move along. I know a good spot where you can just stand around and I’ll get you some EXP.]

The others agreed slowly one after the other and they set out following behind Ivan as he led them deeper into the forested area. He was glad that they had down the very basics of walking and using the chatbox. It would have been painful if he had to explain that much to them. They followed and followed, fighting some low level ogres on their way. He tried his best to restrain himself to let them figure out fighting for themselves so they could at least play and collect gold for Kotetsu’s daughter on their own when he wasn’t around. He still lent them some more of his magic when they encountered another strong dragon, though, blasting it to digital dust just like he had done with the other one.

 **pikapika:** [Guys...]

Pao-lin’s character suddenly stopped and the group halted to listen to her.

 **pikapika:** [Guys, I think we’re missing Keith.]

Right... When was the last time Ivan even saw SkyHigh70656? He thought he had been right behind him, but maybe he’d just gotten lost.

 **nATALIE:** [He may have just wandered off and got lost. He could be anywhere. This is a big area.]

 **Coronado:** [Then shouldn’t we go look for him?]

 **BlazeRunner:** [He’ll probably show up eventually. Right, Ivan?]

 **nATALIE:** [Yeah, let’s just keep training for now.]

So they went back to training like he suggested. However, Keith still didn’t come back to the party and just as Ivan was starting to consider letting them all go to look for him, he was surprised to realize that they were missing another person from their group.

 **BlazeRunner:** [What happened to Antonio? Did he go off to look for Keith?]

 **nATALIE:** [Probably, he sounded worried.]

 **Tora:** [well we’re all worried. hes one of our comrades!]

 **nATALIE:** [Whatever, could you put some of that new magic of yours to use? If you were more focused then we wouldn’t have to worry about anyone if they got lost because you’d be strong enough to take care of yourself.]

Kotetsu stayed quiet then.

Too quiet.

 **Shiva18:** [He ran off, didn’t he? You made him mad.]

 **pikapika:** [Don’t worry, I won’t go anywhere. I wanna get matching ears for my character. Let’s go make more gold.]

 **BlazeRunner:** [I would also love to have some new accessories for my character, but I’m going to go try to figure out where they went. Maybe I’ll give Antonio a call...]

 **nATALIE:** [Okay yeah you do that.]

And so it was that Ivan came to have a party full of girls. From the outside, other users would probably think that they were all girls if they didn’t know who Ivan was. It was just him, a cat-tailed martial artist, and an ice goddess wannabe. It wasn’t even that bad of a party when he factored in nATALIE’s swordsman capabilities. They lacked a little defense, but when they found Antonio, they’d be a decent team.

 **pikapika:** [Ivan... I think I see someone over there.]

 **Shiva18:** [Yeah, there’s this guy who’s been creeping on us this whole time. Look over by the river over there.]

Huh? Ivan hadn’t noticed anyone suspicious... In fact, their whole training area had been nice and quiet without any activity from other users. But... when he started thinking about that, maybe that was sort of very suspicious. This was one of the main worlds that a lot of new users visited, so where were they all? The last time he came, the place was literally crawling with noobs everywhere.

There was only one good explanation. It was easy enough to believe that his friends were just that bad at the game, but it seemed like too much of a coincidence that he hadn’t seen anyone else. That meant... They had a player killer on their hands.

 **nATALIE:** [Looks like we have company. Keep your guard up.]

 **pikapika:** [Wow, Ivan. You’re kind of cool in this world.]

 **nATALIE:** [Hey.]

 **Shiva18:** [uh what are we guarding against?]

 **nATALIE:** [A PK.]

 **pikapika:** [What’s that?]

Before he could even type a response to that, suddenly, a bolt of lightning struck pikapika directly and took out all of her HP. Her character staggered and fell face-first into the grass. nATALIE stepped in front of Shiva18, holding out her wandsword protectively. Who the heck was this PK? Why did they have to show up on the day when they were all going to gather together?

A person jumped down from a tree nearby and gracefully landed on their feet. When Ivan brought nATALIE a little closer, he could see the user’s long rabbit ears and recognized their character type as a part of the Usa clan. It was a kind of character that one had to spend a ridiculous amount of gold for to even play as. In other words, if you saw someone using an Usa, it meant that they were already a very experienced player. Unfortunately for Karina, he had never had to fight one of them personally. Even if he escaped from him, there was no way for Karina to stand a chance. Even with pikapika’s natural resistance to some electric damage, she was still down in one shot.

Ivan knew nothing about this player, but he could just tell that they were dripping with arrogance. The Usa character, whether male or female, had a very sexy figure; long legs, tight clothes and armor, and angular features. Ivan didn’t even want to play as an Usa, but he always felt like the people who did were just dicks who wanted to flaunt how much gold they had. Along with that and all of the expensive, rare accessories this PK had on their character, Ivan knew that they had to be a total jerk in real life.

The PK raised his bow at them and took aim.

 **Junior:** [Lower your weapon. I only want to destroy the girl.]

 **nATALIE:** [Never. You can suck my dick.]

 **Junior:** [One more warning and then I’ll shoot you too, if I have to.]

He really valued his character. It would look pathetic if he let himself be wiped out by such a user and even worse, he _really_ didn’t want to see nATALIE get hurt. At the same time, if he stepped aside and let him take out Karina, then what kind of friend was he? After all, he’d agreed to this.

He hated it. He felt pathetic. But he had to fight. Maybe if he just tried to distract him for long enough then Karina could get away.

 **nATALIE:** [Karina, you should run now. Or turn off your game. I’ll handle this guy.]

Just like that, he watched Karina’s status go offline and her character went gray, then disappeared. Now it was just him and Junior, whose rage he had incited. The moment that he realized that Shiva18 was gone, he lunged toward nATALIE and sent a flaming fist flying right at her face. Ivan managed to dodge a direct hit, but the peripheral damage he sustained was still substantial. If he took more than a few hits, he would be in danger.

 **nATALIE:** [Why are you doing this? Just fucking knock it off already!]

 **Junior:** [I can’t let that old man get sucked into the internet again. You saw what happened the last time!]

 **nATALIE:** [The last time?]

Slowly, Ivan realized who this person was that he was fighting. Junior was _Barnaby Brooks Jr._ and it looked like he was out to stop the group from going down the road to destruction again. Of course it would make sense that he would still target Ivan when he was the one who had tried to help them. If Barnaby wanted to take care of the situation, then he was going to nip it in the bud.

But Ivan wouldn’t stand for that. This was _his_ game. It didn’t matter how long Barnaby had played (or, more likely, how much money he had spent to guarantee himself a powerful enough character), Ivan was going to stop him.

Somehow.

He honestly wasn’t doing very well. It wasn’t a fair fight at all, especially when he realized that Barnaby had just purchased his way to a high level.

nATALIE crumbled to her knees, her HP in the red. One more hit... Ivan didn’t want to sacrifice the kind of EXP it took to resurrect a character. _nATALIE..._

At his desk, Ivan shut his eyes tightly and tried his best to endure what he expected to be the killing blow. While his eyes were still closed, he tried to prepare himself for when he opened them to see the Game Over screen. Although, when he opened his eyes...

A blue fox person stood over the defeated body of Barnaby’s Usa, a smoking gun held loosely in one hand. The rare of the rare, such a fox character was only obtainable by... defeating the dragon at the end of the Cave of Eternal Sorrows. Whoever they were, this person had managed to beat the quest that had caused Ivan to die many a time over as he tried to beat it again and again. His character had the Black Thanatos Armor that Ivan yearned desperately for as well. Even if it wouldn’t look good on nATALIE, it would still aid him greatly in completing the quest.

 **nATALIE:** [Thank you so much for saving me. I thought I was done for.]

 **stophavingfun:** [NO PROBLEM.]

Ivan picked up his drink, took a sip, and spit it at his monitor.

 **nATALIE:** [SINCE WHEN DO YOU PLAY THIS GAME?]

 **stophavingfun:** [SINCE WE’RE MADE FOR EACH OTHER. LOLOLOL Nah, I’ve been playing for a while. I thought you saw it in my profile?]

 **nATALIE:** [No. No, I did not see that in your profile. But... I guess you noticed that I play it then.]

 **stophavingfun:** [YOUR PROFILE IS PRACTICALLY A SHRINE TO ORIGAMI CYCLONE AND YOUR FANCY SAILOR AVATAR. LMAO HOW COULD I NOT NOTICE THAT?]

Ivan didn’t respond. He quietly curled up the top of his forgotten bag of popcorn, put it next to his monitor, and took another sip of his drink. He logged off while Yuri was still talking at him and then turned off his computer. Then he got up and turned off the lights, turned back the sheets on his bed, and climbed inside.

Once he was settled, he heaved a sigh.

“...I didn’t know he played it and he even has a better character than me.”

Laying on his back, Ivan stared at his ceiling and thought about what he was going to have to do to convince Yuri to help him beat the dragon at the end of the Cave of Eternal Sorrows.


	2. Beggars Can't Be Choosers

The morning after that odd night in Fancy Sailor, Ivan awoke feeling like all of it had just been a dream. It had to be a dream because otherwise he was going to have to face the strange fact that not only was Yuri in his game, he was also _extremely_ good at it somehow.

It didn’t add up in his mind, but when he considered that Yuri was also an active troll on the Hero TV Forums, he realized that maybe it was time to accept that Yuri was just a very unpredictable person. Or maybe this was what it was like when someone was really, really good at concealing their power level...

Either way, Ivan had a new goal. He had to get Yuri to show him the way through the Cave of Eternal Sorrows. He was strong enough to take out Barnaby’s over-powered character, so he must have gotten past the dragon at the end of the cave. By himself, though...? He didn’t have a party. That was madness.

Yuri was truly a fearsome person.

Yuri seemed to have a thing for spoiling him. If he even mentioned once that a new anime blu-ray was coming out, he would find it waiting for him when he went over to Yuri’s place. It thrilled Ivan, but at the same time, he didn’t want to ever feel like he was using him. That was what made him start choosing his words carefully around him. If he showed any excitement over something, it was likely to be in his hands soon after mentioning it.

Come to think of it, it was possible that Yuri had bought his character like Barnaby had, but the main difference was that armor and that fox character. Ivan had never seen those listed on any auction sites and hacking items was a bannable offense. They weren’t one-of-a-kind or anything, but they were definitely that hard to obtain. Yuri was legit.

They weren’t just things he could ask for. He was going to have to make some effort on his end to get them.

In his room that morning, he sat with his cheek in his palm, mousing between his game and the forum, unsure of what to do. The popcorn from the night before smelled stale and probably tasted stale, too. Sparing it a sour face, Ivan decided to get himself moving. The first thing to do was ask Yuri what he thought.

But the actual first thing was to get rid of that popcorn bag.

Once it was in the trash, he devoted himself to a loving private message to Yuri in which he praised his strength and thanked him profusely for saving him and nATALIE from danger.

Sent. Not even five minutes later, he got a message back.

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **stophavingfun**  
YOU’RE WELCOME._

_YOU WANT SOMETHING, DON’T YOU._

Okay... Maybe his intentions had somehow been transparent. How did he know, though? He hadn’t even mentioned anything about that! It wasn’t fair how good Yuri had gotten at reading his mind like that. What he needed was armor like Yuri’s if he wanted to get through the Cave, but he could do it just as well if he had Yuri’s help. Help was all he really wanted.

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **_origamically**  
I just wanna know how you got through the cave to get your character and I wanna know how you got that armor. Your level isn’t that much higher than mine, so what did you do?_

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **stophavingfun**  
NOTHING SPECIAL. I JUST WENT IN WITH MY GUNS AND KILLED THE DRAGON._

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **_origamically**  
omg that is so not specific. You can’t just KILL that dragon. I’m sure you had to have some way to defend yourself. What kind of barriers were you using and what was your armor like when you fought it? Did you have the Black Thanatos Armor then?_

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **stophavingfun**  
I JUST WENT IN. AND KILLED THE DRAGON. U’RE JELUZ BECAUSE YOU SUCK AT FANCY SAILOR AND I DON’T.  
Seriously, I wasn’t doing anything special. Regular shop-bought armor and same guns I have now from that one event last year. LOL Why do people think it’s hard?_

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **_origamically**  
OMG, BECAUSE IT IS HARD. How the heck did you do it...  
I just want to beat that quest so I can have the badge for it in my user info, basically. I also wouldn’t mind having armor like yours. (Heck, I could sell the fox option, couldn’t I? I bet it would be worth a lot.) So what do I gotta do?_

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **stophavingfun**  
YOU CAN’T SELL THE OPTION AND YOU CAN’T TRADE IT. YOU DIDN’T KNOW? LOL IT’S PERMANENT TO YOUR ACCOUNT. IT’S THE BEST CHARACTER ANYWAY SO IDK WHY YOU WOULD WANT TO GET RID OF IT.  
Anyway, you’re going to have to do something really special for me if you think I’m going to help you on this. I don’t play this shit for anyone but myself._

He sounded proud that he didn’t play with other people, but did he realize how nerdy that still made him sound? Moreover, Ivan realized that this wasn’t like the other things Yuri had generously bought for him. They required more than just money.

But it wasn’t a problem for Yuri, was it? Why couldn’t he just go in there with his apparently amazing guns and beat it again for him? ...Dammit.

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **_origamically**  
Fine. I’m always ‘doing things for you’ anyway. Just think about what you want me to do and then let me know. (Not that I’m SELLING myself for your help. I’m just saying I do stuff with you anyway, so. Yeah. Don’t look at me like that. I know how that sounded.)_

_[re: ilu foreverrrr~]  
 **stophavingfun**  
I ALREADY HAVE THE PERFECT IDEA. I HOPE YOU’RE PREPARED.  
It might take me a day or two to get it together, though._

And that was how his message ended and he didn’t reply back when Ivan asked him what he was thinking of. He was going to let him sit there and wonder about what it could possibly be. Before he knew it, he was already thinking of some pretty outlandish things. Like, what was going to take him _two days_ to get? An exotic animal?

Three days actually passed before he heard anything back from Yuri about his ‘idea’. While Ivan was busy coming up with his own wild speculations, he considered the possibility that Yuri had been lying. He may not have had an immediate idea at all. What was he doing...? Thinking about it was distracting Ivan enough that he was starting to worry for his own safety while he was out being a hero. If he weren’t careful, he was going to end up running head-first into their next criminal or he’d fall right off a building or something while he thought about what bad things Yuri had planned.

The next time Yuri brought it up was to announce proudly that it was complete... Whatever ‘it’ was. ( _IT’S DONE. I HOPE YOU LIKE IT._ ) Ivan was worried, kind of.

In the message he sent, he made sure to tell Ivan to stay where he was. That made Ivan... nervous.

He didn’t like inviting people over for a reason. It was one thing for him to sit in his room full of figures, posters, and other collectors’ items, but for someone else to come in and see all that stuff, he knew it could be perceived with different eyes. To him, it was a comfortable spot to hang out in. To others, it looked like the room of someone with a serious, creepy obsession with big-eyed little girls.

Yuri wanted to come to _his_ place? That was going to be a problem. He had relatively tasteful Japanese-style decorating throughout his home, but his room would be seen as a total weeaboo disaster to an outsider. Taking everything down before he came there wasn’t an option because there wasn’t even enough space for it all under his bed. And there was no way he was going to throw anything out.

He seemed to accept his obsession so far. What was one room, right? Yeah.

_Oh god, I’m so embarrassing._

Amid his lamenting, face in his hands, Ivan heard the doorbell ring. Feeling ridiculous and ashamed of himself, he forced himself to get up and walk to the door. When he opened it, Yuri was standing on his doorstep with something in hand. It looked like one of those long bags you carry dry cleaned clothes in to keep them from getting wrinkles in your car.

So he asked. “Dry cleaning?” The bag was opaque grey. No idea what was in it.

Yuri smirked and stepped around him into his place. “It’s part of our trade.”

“Yeah?” _Scared, scared, scared._ Ivan shut the door, then shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. What was he supposed to do now, exactly? He hadn’t expected Yuri to ever want to come to his place, so he hadn’t ever thought about what they would do if he _did_.

Maybe he could just keep him in the living room...

“Let’s go to your bedroom.” _Mind-reader!_

“Do you want a drink or anything? I could go get something from the fridge.”

Yuri gave him a look that meant he wasn’t buying it. He could always smell when something was up. “Are we doing this or not?”

His plans for stalling weren’t working. Okay... Okay... No, he couldn’t think of anything else. His mind was shutting down already. “Yeah, we are,” he said, trying to keep his exasperation out of his voice. “So what _is_ in the bag? Clothes?”

He ruined the surprise, didn’t he? Yuri looked kind of mad.

“It’s clothes?”

“I guess that’s obvious, isn’t it...”

“It is.”

After a sigh, Yuri put the bag over his shoulder and started heading in the direction of Ivan’s room. How did he even know where it was? Ivan really wished he knew what to do to stop this from happening right there, but it was already too late. Yuri pushed open the door himself and went inside, dumping the bag on the bed, then stood back to wait.

Like waiting calmly, seriously, in this room was even possible.

Was it possible?

Yuri didn’t seem... fazed at all. He just looked a little annoyed that he had to wait when clearly all he cared about was getting him to open this mystery gift he had brought for him. Ivan really had to ask, though, even if it was like stepping into a minefield.

“My room. It’s not weird, is it?” _Of course it’s weird, baka!_

Yuri shrugged, looking so, so unfazed. “What’s weird about it? I know you’re dedicated to what you like.”

_KYUUUUUUN!_

“Really? _Really?_ It’s not weird to you?” Yuri pinched the bridge of his nose. Maybe he shouldn’t act so surprised, after all. Yuri was apparently a secret Super Saiyan himself. “Sorry, got it.”

When he was sure he wasn’t going to be asked again, Yuri pointed to his bag. “You can feel free to take that out now”

Ivan felt skeptical about this. “What’s the big deal? You’re giving me a gift? That’s not how exchanges work, you know...”

“You’ll see. Just open it.”

Just open it, huh... Ivan sat on the bed and pulled it into his lap. It was a little heavy, now that he could feel it for himself. Something underneath felt hard, too. If he shook it, he was pretty sure that wouldn’t help shine any light on what it could be, so he decided to start opening it, pulling the plastic over it from the bottom.

Were those... armored shin guards? Those definitely were; the real deal, too. He continued up, up, ...up. Oh.

Tiny shorts. A delicate cotton shirt. A _chest plate._ And... a cape.

“You’re missing the ears and tail.”

“They’re in there.”

Oh, so they were.

“This is nATALIE’s outfit.”

“It is.”

Yuri’s idea and intentions were now _very_ clear. He took so much time to ‘get things together’ because he had apparently commissioned someone to make him this excellent cosplay of his character. It was great. Really, it was. But Ivan was a guy and the problem with this costume was how feminine it looked. He didn’t even know how he would look with thigh-high socks on, but he was probably going to have to find out very soon.

“I take it that you want me to wear this.”

That grin. “I’ll help you put it on if you want.”

Ivan held up both of his hands and then looked down warily at the costume in his lap. “That’s alright, I can do it myself.”

It wasn’t alright, though. The main problem here was that... Ivan sort of _wanted_ to know how he looked in it. Call it sick curiosity. Call it a fetish. Maybe he just wanted to see what nATALIE’s outfit looked like on a real person. The fact was still that a part of him did not mind this turn of events.

He pulled off his jacket and his shirt, then lost his pants and socks and then got confused when he realized that he was wearing shorts that would definitely be longer than the little shorts Yuri was expecting him to wear. How was he supposed to do this now? Did he have to take them off and go commando? That could be uncomfortable, especially when he considered the zipper...

“Check the bag.”

“You’re a pervert.” There were panties in there along with the rest of the things; low-rise, pink and white panties with little cat faces all over them.

“They’re just like what you said you thought she’d wear, right?”

“That doesn’t change the fact that you accounted for such a detail. You pervert.” Ivan’s lips quivered as he tried to resist the grin that spread across his face. Yuri was absolutely disgusting and Ivan was, for reasons he couldn’t explain, very willing to try these on.

He stripped out of his shorts and stepped into the small garment. He felt a little bad that he was already getting hard. The last thing he wanted to do was stretch them out because to be honest, he was starting to think he’d enjoy wearing them more than once. Just as he thought, they were really soft. They were tight, but not too tight, also.

He was just kind of disappointed when he had to put the shorts on because he liked looking at the kitties. Putting them on was their own challenge, too. Getting the zipper up and getting them buttoned was somewhat difficult but he managed, even if it made things tighter. He held up the shirt next, admiring the sheer fabric and how every detail of the style was exactly like nATALIE’s, right down to the kind of ribbon that was laced at the collar.

“Whoever made this did a really amazing job,” he said appreciatively.

“Thank you,” Yuri said.

Carefully, he slid his arms into it and slipped it over his head. Rather considerately (or just because he couldn’t keep his hands to himself anymore), Yuri helped tie the ribbons on the sleeves and at the neck. He stood back to take him in and then nodded for him to continue, apparently pleased with what he saw so far. Ivan was okay with the shorts but he didn’t know how to feel about a shirt that wasn’t even long enough to cover his bellybutton. It looked cute on a catgirl, but on him it was somewhat unflattering.

“This looks better on her.”

“Nonsense,” Yuri said, probably trying to sound reassuring. He was leering, though. Ivan didn’t know whether he should feel reassured or whether he should start covering himself. “Have I ever told you that I like how thin you are?”

Creepy. “I think so.” Even creepier that he was _reminding him,_ if that was the case. Ivan tried to appreciate the compliment, though.

He dug into the bag again and came up with a pair of black socks. He sat on the bed and pulled each one on carefully, then stood to pull them the rest of the way up his thighs. _Zettai ryouiki._ He tried not to be obvious before, but this time, he really had to go over to his mirror to see how he looked in them. Unfortunately, that meant he got a look at how the rest of it looked on him so far and his fear was confirmed about that shirt. It looked so awkward to him.

“Stop scrutinizing yourself. It’s good.”

“W-Well you should stop looking at me like that.”

Yuri continued to grin and stare. “Looking at you is the whole point, though. That’s what I’m getting out of this deal.”

Ivan worried the edge of the thin shirt between his fingers and looked up at him timidly from beneath his eyelashes. “So... are you going to fuck me while I’m wearing this?”

Yuri looked surprised then pleased all in the same second. “After we do the quest, maybe.” Right, he wanted him to stay in the outfit for as long as possible, probably. “Or maybe while we’re doing the quest.” _Oh god._ “Put on the rest of it.”

Nothing like jumping to the point. Ivan just hoped that the shirt might look a little less awkward on him when he put the chestplate on. The shirt just accentuated all the most unfortunate aspects of him. Yuri seemed to really like his thinness, but that was something that still made him feel uncomfortable. It really didn’t seem to matter how many cheeseburgers he ate, he was always too skinny...

The chestplate made it worse. The metal that was used for it was thin and it wasn’t very heavy (Was it aluminum? Ivan really wondered.) but the size it added to his chest just made his waist look thinner. He should have known when he was the one who was so familiar with how it looked on his own character. Yuri was grinning, he was sure. He just didn’t want to look at him to confirm it.

“Do I have to put on the leg things? I don’t have boots to go under them...”

“That’s alright.” Yuri sighed. “I would have liked to see you in them, but the shoes and cape aren’t finished yet. The gloves should be in there, though.”

So they were... But wait, Yuri was even having _shoes_ made for him? This was all high-quality stuff, though. Even if it was embarrassing, Ivan felt really excited to see these things in real life. It was like having real clothing from the world of Fancy Sailor, purchased in a place far beyond human reach. If he wanted to, he could even play the game now and feel like he was nATALIE-

_What am I even thinking? I..._

He would totally do that when he was alone.

He was about to do it in a minute with Yuri too, if what he said was to be believed. The only way this could get stranger for him would be if Yuri suddenly revealed that he had a cosplay of his fox character that he was going to go put on. That would be... That would be weird.

Also kind of hot in a way that made Ivan worry if he was turning furry or something.

Distracting himself, he asked, “So does your character have a name?”

Yuri finally sat down calmly at Ivan’s desk and turned on his computer while he answered. “No. I don’t really play it for the story or anything. It’s just a good stress reliever after work. It feels good when I get to take care of guys like Barnaby.”

Ivan nodded understandingly as he slid his fingers into the gloves. They felt like soft leather and they had metal plates attached to the top side that made them a little bit heavy. The image was almost complete. Ivan check himself in the mirror again as he turned around with the cat tail and attempted to attach it to the back of the shorts. There was a pin on it but his fingers kept slipping when he tried to unclip it and he feared that he was going to stab himself in the ass with it.

“Allow me,” Yuri said, standing up from the computer while it was still starting up. He took the tail from his hands and got behind him. A shiver went straight up Ivan’s spine when he felt Yuri’s cold fingers against his lower back, tugging out the waistband of his pants. There was a little more touching than Ivan thought was necessary, but when he looked back in the mirror, he was really impressed.

“It’s like it’s a part of me,” he admired, wiggling his hips to make the tail wag. Yuri was eyeballing him, of course. He felt like he was exploiting himself when he noticed him looking, but it was all going to be worth it. Everyone would have to acknowledge his skill if he had the badge in his profile. “I know you like looking, but was there anything else you wanted? The desktop’s up now.”

Yuri blinked and had to tear his eyes off him to check the computer. “So it is,” he said, sounding as absent about it as he looked. Quickly, Yuri glanced between the table and the bed and Ivan had to wonder what he was thinking. Both were lined up horizontally against the same wall, so Yuri hardly had to turn to see him, which... which probably meant bad things, Ivan realized. “I’ve already played this and I feel like I could do it blindfolded now, so why don’t you keep me entertained while I do it for you?”

 _How many times have you played it?_ Ivan wondered. Still, he asked, “What do you expect me to do?”

Yuri was quiet for a moment, opening the game, starting it up. (Ivan wondered if he should stop letting his computer remember his password for him in the future. It made it too easy for Yuri to log in under his name.) Then, once he had nATALIE on the screen, he leaned back in the chair. “Finger yourself. I’ll watch. I don’t want you to come until I’ve finished this quest, though.”

Well that was very to-the-point. Ivan could feel himself blushing all the way to his ears even though he realized he should have been familiar with such a request by now. (Such an ‘order’, rather.) The lube was in the drawer in his desk right next to where Yuri was sitting which, of course, meant he was going to have to lean down right next to him to get it.

Gritting his teeth, steeling himself, he got off the bed and came over, bending low to open the draw the retrieve the tube. All the while, he could feel Yuri’s eyes watching the curve of his backside in the tight, tight shorts. There was a reason why he didn’t wear something like this in public.

It was ridiculously embarrassing. And arousing.

He would have slapped himself for it, but he loved it too much. He wanted Yuri to make him feel a little uncomfortable because, for whatever reason, it just made him harder. Even if his knees were shaking a little, there was still something about it that made it unmistakably exciting to sit back down on the bed. From the corner of his eye, Yuri kept glancing to watch him as he drove nATALIE toward the cave.

Thinking that it would be a shame to jump to the action without giving Yuri a chance to appreciate him in the outfit itself, Ivan decided to take his time. He laid back on the bed, resting his head against the pillow comfortably, spreading his legs out slightly in front of himself over the sheets. Yuri’s eyes travelled from his ankles all the way to his partially exposed torso and Ivan felt a little proud. He could finally say that he knew what it was like to have zettai ryouiki. The male gaze felt so shameful, so wonderful.

If a person could really nosebleed from arousal, then he was sure he would have been shooting blood all over the bed already. Who knew he was _this_ much of a pervert in real life? For a while there, he thought it only applied to his fanfic-writing ways.

Yuri had barely just started playing, but Ivan already knew this was going to turn into a personal contest for his attention, feeling like he had to get his eyes on him at all times. Probably attracted just as much to the way his legs looked in the thigh high socks as Yuri was, Ivan couldn’t keep himself from staring at the exposed skin between the shorts and socks. He ran his hands down his sides, over his hips, and down the sensitive inner side of his thighs. Yuri let out a long-held breath and Ivan smiled. He was going to leave the socks on.

He slowly unbuttoned the shorts, somewhat distracted by watching nATALIE running while Yuri was distracted watching him unbutton them. It was a mystery how they managed to function at all when they were already doing so well to distract each other. Ivan slid them down his hips along with the panties and all of his senses got shocked back at once when he felt the cold air of his bedroom hit his cock.  
How did he even get it to stay in there to start with? When he realized just how hard he’d gotten, he felt his face heat up so much that he was concerned he’d start to melt. Yuri was pretending not to care. He had to be because he had an elbow on the desk and a hand pressed to his mouth to hide the huge, disgusting grin he had. The man was a truly cruel bastard because Ivan knew he wasn’t going to be allowed to touch his cock at all at this point. If he did, he was almost sure that he would lose it.

The armored chest plate suddenly felt heavier than he would have liked. It made him feel sort of winded when he was already taking deep breaths to try to calm down his pounding heart. The pounding just got worse as he reached for the bottle of lubricant he had set next to himself on the bed. As he uncapped it and squeezed some into his hand, his cock twitched wantonly and he begged it not to embarrass him further. It was already hard enough not to feel effected by the looks Yuri was giving him.

Yuri kept alternating between trying not to seem _too_ distracted and unabashedly looking at him, taking all of him in. Any time there was a loading screen basically, he let his attention all go back on him. Did Yuri know that he had some teleportation stones in his inventory he could use to get to the cave? It was a pretty long walk if he wasn’t going to use them, but he probably wanted to use every loading screen he could get. The only reason Ivan was starting to mind was because every second was starting to make him more aware of the fact that he wasn’t going to be able to come until Yuri did his damn quest.

“You’re playing, right?”

“Impatient,” Yuri said, looking back to the screen. At least now Ivan knew he wasn’t joking. He really was heading in the right way to get to the cave, which meant that this really wasn’t a crazy dream. (It still felt unbelievable, no matter how much proof he had to prove that Yuri was the blue fox.) “I’m getting there. Keep going.”

Ivan supposed that was fair... If Yuri wasn’t stopping, then neither should he. Except Yuri was hardly suffering by playing the game.

Or was he? ...Ivan really wished he could find out if he was getting hard or not in a way that was less than obvious. Yuri did like a direct approach sometimes, though.

“Are you hard?” he asked, bringing his hand between his legs, sliding his fingers teasingly over his entrance, grinning devilishly because Yuri had the _full view._

Yuri laughed slightly under his breath. “Of course I am,” he said, eyes half-lidded as he watched nATALIE run.

Oh shit. Wait, _why_ did he ask him that, again? He wanted to know because he would have felt kind of used if the answer were ‘no’, but getting a ‘yes’ made him want to pull Yuri on top of him. Was this a long quest? He really hoped it wasn’t.

It was unusually sexy to see Yuri sitting at his chair, using his computer to do something like play _Fancy Sailor_ of all things. Ivan never expected that something like that would turn him on so hard, but it really did. While he had two fingers on one hand already pressing inside him, his other hand felt too idly, constantly tempted to reach up to touch his cock.

At least Yuri was in the cave, finally. He already knew that she could handle the regular monsters in the area, but he wanted to know how Yuri planned to take on the dragon. He couldn’t even tell which he should be focused on more anymore; touching himself or watching Yuri play. Both were appealing.

“Don’t get distracted,” Yuri said, looking back over at him. He gave a little, smug laugh. “You look like you’re ready to come already. You’re going to make it all the way though, aren’t you?”

Ivan nodded and grit his teeth. “Y-yeah, of course I am...”

That was really easy to say.

“You’re going to wait because you want me to fuck you, don’t you?”

That wasn’t in the deal originally, but yes. Yes, he really did want him to fuck him, especially when he was starting to feel so ready for it. His own fingers weren’t enough. His cock throbbed painfully and it only got worse the deeper Yuri pushed through the cave. It was the worst metaphor Ivan had ever thought of. Pushing ‘deep’ through the ‘cave’? He was sure he read pornfics with lines like that before.

After just a few minutes of slowly pushing his fingers inside of himself, he was getting really close to coming - or passing out. Whichever came first. Meanwhile, Yuri had finally reached the dragon. Ivan thanked God that the cave wasn’t as deep as he thought it was. While the dragon started up his monologue about how he wanted to devour this lowly traveler, Yuri ignored it and paid attention to Ivan.

“Does it feel good?”

Ivan bit back a whimper. Even though the shirt was thinner than paper, the chest plate was making it hot and hard to breathe. He swallowed thickly first before he could talk. “Yeah... Not... Not as good as you, though.”

_That’s so embarrassing. What the hell am I saying?_

“I want to see you touch your cock. Don’t let yourself come though, got it?”

Ivan nodded weakly, tucking his chin to his chest while he looked down. It was his own cock, but there was something about how seeing how hard this had been getting him that made it even worse. He ran his fingers through the drops of precum he had been dripping onto his stomach and used it to wet his fingers a little more. The first touch he placed to the head was almost too much and made his eyes shut as he reeled with the sudden, intense sensation. He’d barely done anything yet, but all the waiting made it feel about as good as when Yuri was giving him constant torture.

Yuri was paying a lot of attention to him now and the dragon had stopped the chit-chat. If he wasn’t careful, nATALIE was going to end up as flamethrower barbecue on the end of one long dragon claw. The more attention Yuri paid to Ivan, the less he cared about what was happening to Ivan’s character and Ivan was starting to get really worried about her rapidly lowering health bar. At the same time, the more Ivan paid attention to nATALIE, the less he attention he paid to himself.

It was already too late when he realized that his hand had started doing whatever it wanted. There were just too many distractions and he couldn’t stop himself in time, his fist quickly stroking him to completion. He threw his head back and groaned in defeat as he came hard onto his stomach. Every muscle in his body spasmed and he felt himself clenching tightly around the fingers he still had inside him, intensifying his orgasm tenfold. 

He fought to open his eyes and clear his head, suddenly feeling way more concerned about what had happened to nATALIE. Something told him that now that he ‘lost’, Yuri was just going to give up entirely and let him figure out the quest for himself.

Except when he managed to focus his vision again...

“Wait, what...”

“I told you it was easy.”

nATALIE spun her wandsword around her head in a classic pose of victory and slid it back into the sheath at her side. The next minute, she was running to collect the prized treasure from the chest behind the dragon’s defeated corpse.

Ivan tore off the annoyingly heavy armored chest piece in frustration and then hid his face in his hands. He did all that for Yuri and he still missed how he went about beating the dragon. There must have been some kind of secret technique. Was this his punishment for coming too soon? It figured. “I still don’t understand how you did it!” he cried.

Yuri shrugged nonchalantly. “There wasn’t anything to it. Anyway, Ivan,” he said, saving and logging out of the game, “you know there’s a punishment for you now, right?”

It _really did figure._


End file.
